Wednesday, 18 January 2017

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Ibu Terkejut Melihat Anaknya Melulis Lukisan Yang Pelik Ini.. Bila Di Tanya Segalanya Terbongkar!!

Ibu Terkejut Melihat Anaknya Melulis Lukisan Yang Pelik Ini.. Bila Di Tanya Segalanya Terbongkar!!

A mother saw a drawing of her child. She was shocked but she doesn't want to believe it. In her she knows her 10 years old is trying to say something to her not directly (i am sure), because it was part of her diary in a box she made from crystals in art class. Nevertheless, she has a picture of it and have a chat woth the daughter.

The daughter was a bit upset she found the drawing. She said it wasn't recent and do not want to make a big deal about it. The mother didn't believe her. She consulted the husband. The husband didn't understand. She consulted the mother. The mother took it away. She is not sure whether her mom throw it away or not. But she couldn't have it back.

She called me up.

I asked her to make a police report.
The husband was not a fan. It is just a drawing. Nothing more. The mother who took the drawing also didn't make any fuss. So they plan to drop it.

The mother make a report. They managed to get the IO to plan with D11 and VCO as well. During the questioning, it took around 5 hours. And they found something else.

The daughter finally ask the question "Selamat ke nak cerita sini?"

From there they found out more than the picture. It was the act, real act fall on to her 5 years ago by someone related to the family. A very close family relations. The police makes a report based on the new findings.

The police ask the mother about the description of the person.

Of course the mother was livid. She knows who is that person. She gave the police all details.

Remanded for questioning.

At the same time, the whole family was in a chaos. All blaming the mother for not getting the family to handle the matter in a close setting. The husband just stay out of it. No support. "I told you so!" was his last words.

Being pressured, the mother decided to retract her report. She calls me for help. She calls the IO for help.

She questioned the daughter again. "Cakap betul-betul. Sapa buat? Ke A salah cakap"
Her daughter at first nodded, but after few times she began to doubt herself.

Tolong saya Syed, saya nak tarik report dan selesai cara keluarga.
Ok, i said. Cuba terangkan pada saya bagaimana cara tu.
She didn't answer.

The case now? I leave it as it is. My part is simply to assured the mom to stick to the report.

Today there was a report of a girl who abandoned her baby and left the baby to die. She has a high CGPA record and was given a chance. I don't know the full case but gotten this fact this way. It was sent to me by the mother.
It so happens the perpetrator was also an excellent student. An exemplary student as well.

I asked again, who's side are you protecting?
She said her child.

I asked again, do you need someone to talk too?
I am a mother and i know what is best for my daughter.
I asked again, do you want to talk to someone about what is best for you?
No need. I am stuck.

I also told her about the perpetrator, he was a minor as well when it happened, don't you want to help him?

Cara keluarga.

Encik Syed, hancur masa depan perpetrator tu kalau saya teruskan! Encik Syed bukan berada dalam keadaan saya. Mana encik paham!
It is true. Saya bukan berada di tempat puan, tapi saya fokus hanya pada anak perempuan puan itu sahaja.

I know this will be long. But its ok. The daughter now is quiet again. She sees all this commotion.

Puan, anak puan tak pernah lupa malah lama betul dia menyimpan cerita ini selama ini. Apa maknanya tu.
Mungkin dia salah ingat orang, that is what the mother said.

There is so many entities that needs to be addressed here.

Let this be a lesson.

Pic is not the real picture. All details are changed.

In my line of work, although not perfect i believe to keep telling children about safe space either school, home or another third place such as grandparents. This will give the kids higher chance. Once they know about safe space, at least they know where to share.
Secondly, it is about secret. There are good secret and bad secrets. In general for kids they have to know that in the safe space they don't have to keep secrets. At all.
Finally, i believe in kids gut feeling. If they have uneasy, creepy or somewhat just plain uncomfortable and they talk about it. Listen. This is where they disclose. Practice to handle disclosure. Please.

Syed Azmi.


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